i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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