he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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