so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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