I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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