It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Randomize