Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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