WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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