I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
