69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize