ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I smell like Dick and happiness
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
