I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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