Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
That accounts for only three of the penises
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize
