New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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