forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
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