The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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