Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
Randomize
