so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Randomize
