Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up backwards on a recliner
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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