I CAN MOONWALK!
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
