I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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