Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial