yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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