did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize