I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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