even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
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I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
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Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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