Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
