Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Barsexuality is the new black.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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