remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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