should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
