One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
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