you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
