plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
