I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
