I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
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