Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Randomize
