so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You are the jesus of drinking
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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