have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Randomize
