living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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