Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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