Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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