I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.