i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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