Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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