There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
