I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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