and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
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I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
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If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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