I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
