just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
