Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
