3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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