My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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